Judgement (Part 2)

God’s judgement, is to become free from ourselves and our destructive behaviour (see part 1). But judgement is also to become free of the consequences of other’s destructive behaviours to us. We think, according to our blackened judgement and self-righteous sentences, that we deserve to be thrown on second-hand sorting, thinking we are just and upfront with ourselves. The problem when we judge ourselves is that we commit the same sin as Satan did. We think that because we have knowledge, we have enough to know the whole truth.

The problem is that we only have parts of the truth about ourselves. Only God knows the true Sentence. And when God is coming to judge, which is happening to us even on earth each day we let God in, our hearts still remains with accusations, while the Sentence of God’s love releases us into freedom. This love of God is the Judgement. We are going to see our true selves, and in the exact same second, without negotiations or deliberations, we’ll be met by an open and accepting embrace. We don’t even have time to understand what just happened. We expected terrible consequences if it came to the worst or an indulgent merciful nodding if it came to the best. And then we thought we were expected to show gratitude. But we find ourselves standing, suddenly, in a flow of naked truth and heated love from somebody’s embrace, and we realise This is God. Is this Judgement? Is this God? Oh I, my Christian fool, who didn’t even knew God! Who can then judge us? With what mandate did we sentence people to hell? Why did we put the oak of the commandments back on people’s shoulders? Maybe because we couldn’t stand that the man with fewer coins was rewarded just as much as us, - the faithful ones?

If sin is destruction, and if judgement is God’s love in a form of a Highest Court, then our freedom is immense and overwhelming, horrendous and frightening, with no limits and no…control. Are we so afraid of loosing control that we gladly pay the prize of freedom, here on earth? Are we so afraid of loosing our golden stars we hid, - just in case, in our shirt sleeves for so many years?

I am a good girl. I am behaving. I never raise my voice, and I only swore in the bathroom once during my pubic years when nobody heard. - These are my golden stars!

What is this? Don’t we trust the grace of salvation? Do we merely talk about redemption, but secretly doubt? Is this why we collect all these golden stars? No I don’t think so. We are probably hoping that God will see this tiny part of faith in our hearts, as well. We hope it will actually be as simple as God promised. And this is probably what it’s going to be like. - But to let go of control? No, no, no. We won’t let go. So we keep collecting stars. This way, we can at least stand firm in comparison to others. Because even if God doesn’t, - others will judge us. We will then hold our stars in front of our faces as a shield of God in a fierce battle. Even if our hearts will be the sole judges, even then we can hope for a fair trial with these golden stars. We’ll take up star after star against our own self-contempt. Let go of control? No! Let go of the golden stars? We would die. Die, die, and die!! We would. Self-contempt would well over us; our enemies would see our despair as they mock us. We wouldn’t look strong. We would look weak. We would look exactly as bad as they say we are. We can’t let that happen. They would win. The evil One would win! We are Christians, we are free, and we’ve got the truth, hallelujah! We’ve got to sharpen that facade at any cost. And if we can make this sharpening look like a pius act, the better.

Go up to mount Moria. Die. Let go of control - Your golden stars, Your fake salvation. You showed them to everybody who thought of christians as hypocrites, because You wanted them to know that christians can be good people too. You showed it to Your class-mate when he asked You about Your faith. You pretended to be humblewhen You said You don't have any answers. But for real, You were scared of saying it wrong. Scared of not measuring it up to God’s approval. Scared of other people’s judgement of Your story in church. You held on to that star when a person who caused You pain constantly tried to reproach You, telling You to do better. You held it up for Yourself saying; I did better than this person, so he/she has no right telling me what to do! And You were right, but the clench to Your rights have tightened and the grip is making Your muscles and knuckles very sore. And falling from that grip is the same as falling from the last thread of Your right to dignity, to Yourself.

You have all the rights to hold on to Your rights. But You can see that over the years, it is only creating a wall around You. A wall of protection not letting others in. And some might be better off left outside, because some are evil people. But let go of Your control, to let the good ones in. Let go of Your rights. Let God do the battle. Let God stand in the midst of the firearms. Let go of the right to stand for Your rights. Die. Like Jesus died away from his rights at the cross. And let all Your feelings come to the surface. Let them come. Let bitterness, anger, hatred, begrudge, pain, and infinite sorrow well up from Your inner self. No, don't think of forgiveness yet. Feel the emotions. And then….let go of them. Forgiveness comes later, when You are not noticing it. Forgiveness is the miracle God will do in Your heart, but only if You realise You cannot forgive by Yourself. And You leave all t he "have-to-dos" for God to perform. Who are we christians who think we can create our own salvation? Let go of control and see what happens! As the Muslims say, - God is greater. God will do more than You imagined, because God loves You more than Your golden stars ever can serve as proof in trial. God is the judge. And God is everlasting abundant overwhelming and naked, -bare naked, burning love.

Sin (Part 1)

We chrisitans no longer know what sin means. Sin is NOT to figure out what is right and wrong, and get golden stars in sunday school.

Let's think of sin as forms of destruction. Åke Green, the pentecostal anti-gay pastor in Sweden, talked about homosexuals as a lump of cancer. Although most christians in Sweden think he took it too far, (but secretly admire him for his courage not to "compromise with the Bible") most christians still have a very ambivalent view of "what the Bible really teaches about homosexuality". I want to take Åke Green's unloving and degrating image of homosexuals, and apply it to sin. Forget the homosexuality for a moment.

If sin is a type of cancer, it spreads. And where it's gone, it is still giving consequences for funstions of the body. A doctor at Oprah Winfrey's show said: "We all have cancer, but we just don't know it yet". And he said that with a healthy living, the break-outs can be prevented. Some christians think this is what they should do with sin, - control it with a healty living. And when they do, they can show off and tell everybody how good they are. But remember, the doctor said we all have it, even if it is prevented. And a break-out can never be controlled. That's why it's called a break-out.

So..sin...Regard it as a State of destruction, where we make bad choices like when we are judging ourselves, when we are scared, when we refuse to look that woman in the eye that just passed us in the mall. As if she doens't exist. Sin is a way of thinking and a way of choosing. It's in our minds. And it doesn't matter how much we try to control it, because it will always be present . It doesn't matter how good we get at figuring out what is right and what is wrong. Who can outsmart Satan? Not me. Destruction can even be more present in a person who thinks he/she's got full control. Why? Because deception is one of the most vital forms of destruction. And most of us christians are so deceivedin our self-righteous knowledge of right and wrong. People outside church are often more christian than christians, because they are listening to their hearts where God is whipering to all humans, than some "real" Christians who think they control it all.

When it comes to sin, most of the times we don't have the tools to free ourselves. That's why it doens't matter that we know right from wrong. We need God to free us. Yet, the church keeps preaching what we should and shouldn't do. Sisters and brothers in church pick it up and pass it on to others what is allowed, and what is not allowed to do. But some of those sisters and brothers actually get the point, that salvation is grace, they listen to Jesus' own holy spirit who whipsers in their hearts. They start praying for You. And then things happen. You become free. And it is a painful process. It is like being born again. You are new, again, and unexperienced. New and confused, but liberated. And Your catalouge of rights and wrongs is still closed and was of no use in the process.

We cannot save ourselves. We cannot control ourselves to freedom. We cannot get our golden stars in the heavenly sunday school, because we are not our own savors. Let go of the control. Let Jesus save You. Get rid of all the church people that condemn You. Pass their judgements to hell where they belong, be filled with love, and then You may choose Yourself what You find vital to listen to. You have been listening to the wrong voices coming from Your head for too long. Only obey and follow your own true convictions. Somebody pious will now add; -But the Word of the Bible? Shouldn't we first and foremost follow this?! Our hearts are deceitful, aren't they?

Yes, the biggest deception is when we believe we can outsmart our own hearts.We take control, by reading what is right and wrong, and then we try to live it. That's deception. The point is to let Jesus take control, and it is impossible if You refuse to loose it! Loose control, risk sinning, and wait for Jesus to save You when it happens. Read the Bible with all that You are, not only Your mind. Read it with feelings. Read it with Your experience. We have been reading it with our worldly wisdom, our brains, for too long. Be free. Start living. Enjoy God's freedom. Somebody again, will add that it is dangerous to let go of all the rules. Jesus said; Don't be afraid, because I am with You. Fear is when love is not complete. Jesus completely loves You. Get rid of Your fear of sinning, which only leads You into the valley of control.

The holy spirit teaches everybody in their hearts. We were given the Bible to help us. We were not created to help the Bible. Say no to religious control. Say no to false idols, like worshipping the Bible in stead of God. Say no to the christian brainwash of Your own mind. Hold on to your dear Jesus, and let go of everything else. Jump off the cliff.

As christians, we should have known the salvation of Jesus, but we took it in our own hands and re-created the laws and rules like the pharisees. God please forgive us! He took the oak away, and we put it back again on people's shoulders so they ran from church like a pius would run from hell. And now we are wondering why so few find their way to the church. And we are wondering why we're all feeling so guilty and doomed, although we are saved. Secretly we admire ourselves for being in control to jugde ourselves just in case God is waiting up there with golden stars to hand out as we enter the heavens. -For heaven's sake, if he questions us, we've got to be able to give him a reply!

What if you forgot all the rules and just did what you wanted to do? Everything constructive, everything beautiful, admirable and honorable. And what if you refused to believe Your heart when it condemns You, and never did anything religiously destructive ever again?You might become free. Don't misuse the freedom in Christ, they tell us. But I say, if that's the prize for freedom ,then go ahead! Start using it, in stead of leaving it by the road out of fear! It's a gift. If You happen to misuse it, it's ok. It's actuallycompletely ok! Remember that Christ saved You, so You have nothing to fear. Just get on Your feet and move on, and don't let Your heart, the Church or Your sisters and brothers condemn You.

Next sermon will be about Jugdement. (Followed by Homosexuality). See you soon. Freedom and peace.